Monthly Archives: January 2013

God Has A Sense Of Humor


Hi everyone!
I’ll just get right into it..
Sometime last year, I mentioned that there was something God had been telling me to do that I didn’t want to do. Well, here’s the break down: I used to sing. Like everyone who knows me would agree that I’m a music head, but what a lot of people wouldn’t know is that I actually can carry a tune and I’m pretty decent. So yeah, I used to sing in church and was a lead vocalist for years until something happened, someone hurt me real bad and I just quit. I mean just like that I gave up something that meant a lot to me. I reasoned that my profession (Law) won’t even allow me do music on a larger scale so there was no point pursuing it.
For a really long while I just let my talent die and I stood on the sidelines and admired people doing what I once used to do.. After a while my passion turned to indifference.
Anyway, last year God started speaking to me about going back to music and I resisted it big time. I just wasn’t ready and no one was going to make me. This struggle went on for months and I mostly just ignored it. Then random people started talking to me about it, even people who didn’t know me when I used to sing and had no inkling. Some would even see me in their dreams.. Lol. God meant business yo! And He so doesn’t fight fair. Anywho, I finally gave in to it and just yielded. I knew it would be pretty tough and after the first few weeks, I quit again. I began talking to God about it all the time and finally found the courage to go back. So, in November last year, I went back to the choir in my church albeit on part time basis. Last week in December, as I was writing my goals for 2013, I wrote down that I really wanted to take music seriously in church and prayed for grace.
Fast forward to January 5th 2013, I was in church for a meeting (totally unrelated to this one) when I got a message that the church was forming a new music band separate from the mass choir. The new band will be in charge of all Sunday services and church programs and the Mass choir would only function on “special occasions”. Now here’s the twist, guess who was selected to head this new band? Yep! Yours truly! As soon as I got the message, I just started laughing. I mean God does have a sense of humor!!! Like, He’s not even giving me a chance to chicken out. He’s saying, “you wanna be serious with music, no? Well, here’s your chance”. I was almost going to reject the position but I thought about it and yes, it’s a challenge but I welcome it.
I trust that God has a purpose for this and the last few weeks have been hectic but I know He won’t give me more than I can handle. So yeah I’ll give this my best shot. I won’t even lie, it’s challenging but I’m enjoying myself so much. It’s amazing how everything else fades away as soon as I start to worship. I just get transported to a different world. And knowing that one person is being blessed is beyond fantastic. I’m truly grateful for this opportunity.

Don’t know why I felt the need to write this today. Maybe someone will read this and be encouraged to do or embrace something they’ve been running away from. Remember we are only stewards of all that we’ve been given, including our gifts and talents, and God is going to ask us what we have done with what we’ve been given. Make the most of every opportunity, no matter how seemingly insignificant or grand. Ask God for help and trust Him to help you. And if you don’t know where or how to begin, ask Him for opportunities and He’ll give them to you. Keep your mind open, you just never know.
Kisses,
FutureNewYorker!

No Complaining


Hello there!
How’s your week going? Hopefully, January has been good to you.
Soooooo it’s been a while since I did an update on what’s been going on with me and honestly, I don’t think I’m ready to do one now but I wanted to share a small part real quick. The last few days have been hell-ish for me. Talk about unnecessary stress from work and what not. Anyway, I realized yesterday that I’ve been complaining A LOT!
There’s a friend of mine I’m almost always chatting with on BBM so he gets a minute-to-minute break down of how my day is going. Yesterday, I was talking to him about stuff that was happening in the office. Actually, I was complaining and ranting about a lot of things. At a point, I had to stop myself. Even I had gotten tired of listening to my own venting and ranting. (I can only imagine how the poor boy has been dealing with me and my complaining for the past few days). I quickly apologized for dumping on him and promised that he’d not hear one more negative remark for the rest of the day… I later adjusted that to the rest of the week, reasoning that I had used up more than a week’s worth of my complaining quota. We laughed about it and he made a joke about his being sure I wouldn’t be able to survive it (or something along those lines).
This episode gave me food for thought last night. I really have been complaining a lot lately. Yes, I’ve had to deal with loads of crap but that’s no excuse. I’m better than this. I shouldn’t be controlled by what’s happening around me. My soul’s enrichment should come from within. Humans will be humans and are bound to screw things up (pardon my language) but that shouldn’t affect my response to it.
Anyway, I’ve decided to take a few days off complaining. (Lol! Let’s see how long I’ll last). Really though, I don’t want to end up old and whiny, with everyone avoiding me and my unending tales of woe. During the 31Days Reset Challenge I did last year, I learned a trick; go around with a notepad and write down everything that makes you want to complain and then think about a silver lining. Situation could be worse but it isn’t… So find something to be grateful for. I’m going to do this for the rest of the week. I’ll let you know how it goes.
To five days of no complaining… Let’s go!
Kisses,
FutureNewYorker!

A Psalm… My Psalm!!


Psalm 139 just became my new favorite Psalm. Funny how I’ve always known this Psalm (even wrote a song with the lyrics for a friend) but today it seemed to me like I was reading it for the very first time. Somehow it seemed like David had taken my very own words, like he was stealing my lines!
1 O LORD, you have examined my heart
and know everything about me. 2 You know when I sit down or stand up.
You know my thoughts even when I’m far away. 3 You see me when I travel
and when I rest at home.
You know everything I do. 4 You know what I am going to say
even before I say it, LORD. 5 You go before me and follow me.
You place your hand of blessing on my head. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too great for me to understand! 7 I can never escape from your Spirit!
I can never get away from your presence! 8 If I go up to heaven, you are there;
if I go down to the grave, you are there. 9 If I ride the wings of the morning,
if I dwell by the farthest oceans, 10 even there your hand will guide me,
and your strength will support me. 11 I could ask the darkness to hide me
and the light around me to become night— 12 but even in darkness I cannot hide from you.
To you the night shines as bright as day.
Darkness and light are the same to you. 13 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
and knit me together in my mother’s womb. 14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it. 15 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,
as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. 16 You saw me before I was born.
Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out
before a single day had passed. 17 How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.
They cannot be numbered! 18 I can’t even count them;
they outnumber the grains of sand!
And when I wake up,
you are still with me! 19 O God, if only you would destroy the wicked!
Get out of my life, you murderers! 20 They blaspheme you;
your enemies misuse your name. 21 O LORD, shouldn’t I hate those who hate you?
Shouldn’t I despise those who oppose you? 22 Yes, I hate them with total hatred,
for your enemies are my enemies. 23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts. 24 Point out anything in me that offends you,
and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

You know the book Letters From God I mentioned in a previous post, here’s another letter based on this Psalm…
I sought you and found you hiding deep within the chambers of your heart, undisclosed and undiscovered with all the pieces of you hiding from life, true life, real life, My life. You were lonely, wandering, lost, disconnected, and unwanted. But no more. Now I am your Hiding Place. I have hidden you in the cleft of the rock, safe, secure, and protected. No ugliness can reach you. No strange or unwelcome voices can confuse you. There will be no strange, unwanted conductors playing on the strings of your heart, for I desire to be your life’s Conductor, Director, and Planner. I will find the music of your life and bring it out. You don’t know it yet, but living inside of you are symphonies of music to move the lost hearts of lonely souls toward Me. I will lead you first by My hand, then by My voice, and finally by a whisper. Then you will know all the purposes for which I created you. I have found all the pieces of you, and I am putting them back together day by day until you are ready to be displayed, totally whole, totally equipped, and totally Mine.

This! This! This!
No words!

Life Is What You Make Of It


Live with no excuses
Love with no regrets
Laugh a lot
And leave this life with nothing left unsaid
Make this world a better place
Don’t be afraid to cry
When it’s finally time to say goodbye,
There’s no nothing to prove, nothing to lose, nothing to hide.
Nothing To Prove ~ Phillips, Craig and Dean

Letters From God


Imagine waking up to a personal letter from God everyday!
Here’s one…
January 19
1 Chronicles 4:40 – And they found fat pasture and good, and the land was wide, and quiet, and peaceable.

The quiet place is your place of refreshing. Come to it; let it heal and strengthen your heart. Let it open your eyes to see the truth of life. Come and bring no falseness or pretense with you, no insecurity, because these are eviction notices. I don’t stay where I am not wanted. Tear your tortured emotions out of your heart. Rip doubt out of your mind and stand in My quiet place in honesty. This way there will be no hindrances to your prayers. Dive headlong into My presence. Let it become your soul’s medicine. Come in and don’t be afraid. I am waiting with open arms. I never break an appointment; don’t break yours. When you linger in My quiet place, you will be permanently transformed. Each day you will grow stronger and wiser. Build your house here; it is where I live. Accept no torment, torture or anxiety; they must never be tolerated. Declare your territory to be peaceful, safe, and good. This is where you will always find me waiting.

Excerpts from Ivan Tait’s Letters From God.

You Are…


You are… My inheritance and my exceeding great reward
The One my soul longs for and my heart’s cry
My place of quiet refuge and my safe place
Lover of my soul and the reason for my being
My ever present help and hope for years to come
My symphony, harmony, melody and unending song
The overwhelming joy of my heart, dance of my feet, and my testimony
My keeper and my strong defense
You are my heart’s home!

Pure Joy!


“Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.” James 1: 2-4 (The Message)
Another translation says “consider it PURE JOY… Whenever you face trials of many kinds”. The book of James is one of my favorite in the Bible and this particular verse has been very dear to me for a while now.
I’m not here to “preach” this verse or anything but let me just share with you quickly some of what’s been going through my mind. The most dominant emotion for me towards the end of 2012 and coming into 2013 has been fear. I’ve been scared of making plans, of setting goals, of expectations. So when everyone was giddy about 2013 and saying how awesome it’s gonna be, I was just like O_O okay, you guys, carry on. And while I tried to believe with the rest of the world, and put down some plans on paper, I’ve just been scared of disappointments. It’s easier to not hope at all than to hope and get nothing out of it. The end of 2012 was REALLY tough for me so 2013 wasn’t looking bright at all.
Anyway, I’ve been avoiding prayers a lot lately… Mostly because I don’t want to sound all whiny, and overly emotional and spend my time complaining due to how I feel. I know this is a wrong approach, still it’s the one I took. I however have been studying the Word a lot and I’m slowly but steadily re-building my prayer life and talking to God all day. Some days are easier than others.
Okay, so I said all that to say this; I know 2013 is not going to be a walk in the park. I was talking to a friend this evening and I mentioned that I know my faith’s going to go through a lot of tests this year.. That’s when I remembered the verse I put up. I know without a doubt that there will be a lot of trials this year but the funny thing is, the fear I once felt is gone. In fact, upon this realization, I’ve been really happy this evening. I can’t explain the joy but it’s just there… “Consider it pure joy…”!!! Right now, the tests and trials are already here, I’m faced with it everyday, but today I’m joyful and I’m glad. I’m being refined and God’s desire is that I come out pure gold! Whoop! So even with everything that’s going on with me now, 2013 has suddenly began to look up. I expect to see significant change; my life changing before my very eyes. It will be rough and sometimes I’d want to give up but… God’s got me!
I’m beginning to rant.. Lemme end here. Pure joy!
Kisses,
FutureNewYorker!

I Miss…


I miss waking up each morning to the message you sent while I slept… Stopping by to drop a kiss in my dreams
I miss hearing your voice when it’s all groggy from not enough sleep… Good morning.. Have an awesome day babe
I miss bugging you all day, filling you in on the minutest details… My colleague just peed her pants! LOL! I crave carbs! Diets suck! Ugh!
I miss those unplanned visits… Surprise! Guess who’s in town? Picking you up from work in a bit
I miss the random messages… You’re beautiful, inside and out! Lucky me
I miss the not so subtle reminders to be better… Okay, time to get off the phone. That article won’t write itself. I’ll proof read if you want. 😀
I miss the chastising… You snapped at your mum?! Why?! Okay, I understand but you have to apologize to her
I miss making future plans… Small wedding, HUGE honeymooning! Lol
I miss helping you pick out an outfit… You should totally rock the brown shoes with that Tee
I miss talking about the little details of the big project… Email sent, one hurdle crossed. Interview with the big man in a bit, pray for me.
I miss the endless teasing and banter… Your head’s big, by the way.. We both know yours is bigger!
I miss the cuddling even when we fight… Oya shift! I want to cuddle
I miss the pampering… You look tired, lie down I’ll massage. You need to eat babe, please. A kiss for every spoon, deal?
Oh, I miss the deals… I get that work is crappy but if you go today and work enough to impress me, you get a gift.
And of course the bribery…
I miss the impromptu fun games… Let’s make lunch together, over the phone of course. You give the instructions and I’ll cook
I miss… Gosh, I miss everything!
I miss the things I can’t have because, well.. Because I’m single. And while being single has it’s perks, I miss the things I could have.

Wanderlust


One step, two step, three step, four
It takes every ounce of strength not to reach for the door
The longing keeps pushing from within my core
I must get out, I must get out some more
That round-the-world ticket still clutched in my purse
Five step, six step, seven step, eight
A gentle reminder that he asked me to wait
Heart’s torn between his homecoming and my being late
One more try K, let’s give this one more date
He doesn’t understand that my soul cannot be tamed
Nine step, ten step, eleven step, twelve
A part of me is left in Venice, nay in Montreal
Maybe beneath the water, therein I must delve
An imperfect puzzle, that piece I must unearth
Somewhere out of here are all that’s left of my years
One step, two step, three step, four
I love you S, but I love me more
Twelve years later and a note you can’t ignore
You know not everyone who wanders is lost
And with that last strength, I push for the door


Habakkuk 3
17 For though the fig tree doesn’t flourish,
nor fruit be in the vines;
the labor of the olive fails,
the fields yield no food;
the flocks are cut off from the fold,
and there is no herd in the stalls:
18 yet I will rejoice in Yahweh.
I will be joyful in the God of my salvation!